I know for sure that the path is brighter based on the constant
wisdom God has granted me. I had been resistant towards administrative
jobs as a permanent career but He has so beautifully reconciled me to
them. My initial goal was feature writing but He so gently prodded me
towards these jobs. He has even granted me interview answers. I have
never had such direct guidance in my previous job interviews. Thinking
back to my whole career path, He has made me walk towards personally
resistant jobs. My first one was in the teaching line. He has also made
me stronger and more thick-skinned in preparation for my new job. I
believe the turning point was my mum's demise.
Though
my heart will always be with teaching and my fantasy job is a governess,
I am grateful for the past 9 years of being able to touch hearts and
lives. As I embark on my first interview, and more to come, I walk with
my Lord and allow Him to lead me. I know He will ultimately lead me
towards the perfect choice He has planned for me. Amen!
Monday, October 15, 2012
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Monday, August 20, 2012
Discovery
I am a little sad at a piece of news I found out. It is good news but not really so for me. I am not sure if this is God's way of revealing His will for my life. I have not exhausted all the options yet but I am not sure if they will still stand.
Nonetheless,I know Daddy-o has heard my deepest desires and whatever He wills for me will be beautiful and perfect for me. Perhaps the little revelations He has given to me are His signs pertaining to it? If so, Lord, please grant me the grace and joy and courage to accept it. I know though that He will be with me as I go through this, as He promised to be with me in all my trials pertaining to my state of life.
Whatever may be, I wish the people involved in the news God's blessings. The good thing is that it is merely slight sorrow but not heartpain. Perhaps this option is really not the right one for me for certain factors. Now that I have found out this news, I know my boundaries and will refrain from any more activity. It is a good decision, I feel, so as to prevent any unnecessary negativity from the other.
God healed me within a short time and I think I know why. I included this option based on head knowledge, that it would be good for me and meet my needs. However, my heart was not in it. Hence, my heart was not hurt :)
Nonetheless,I know Daddy-o has heard my deepest desires and whatever He wills for me will be beautiful and perfect for me. Perhaps the little revelations He has given to me are His signs pertaining to it? If so, Lord, please grant me the grace and joy and courage to accept it. I know though that He will be with me as I go through this, as He promised to be with me in all my trials pertaining to my state of life.
Whatever may be, I wish the people involved in the news God's blessings. The good thing is that it is merely slight sorrow but not heartpain. Perhaps this option is really not the right one for me for certain factors. Now that I have found out this news, I know my boundaries and will refrain from any more activity. It is a good decision, I feel, so as to prevent any unnecessary negativity from the other.
God healed me within a short time and I think I know why. I included this option based on head knowledge, that it would be good for me and meet my needs. However, my heart was not in it. Hence, my heart was not hurt :)
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Assumption of our Blessed Mother
'For I have found His favour
And my heart rejoice in Him.'
As we sang the hymn My Soul Magnifies The Lord and these lines came, I know that my heart sang them too. It truly was the Holy Spirit glorifying God in me and Mother Mary praising Him with me, as I had prayed. My own relationship with God came to mind.
Actually, this prayer had been answered even before I prayed it. How great is my God who knows what I need even before I ask Him! How great is He for using me to glorify Himself! :) During Offertory, I was given the realization that I am special, set apart, anointed and chosen. Despite the times I nurse a flu, I can still sing to His glory. How indulgent and loving He is towards me!
The times He revealed His love for me came flooding back to me. I am referring specifically to God the Father, my Daddy-o. He first did so by calling me to a silent retreat and revealing His constant indulgence towards me. I believe the Holy Spirit gave me this name to address Him with, since they are so close to each other. The proof is that I thought it was just a name I myself came up with but it really means Abba Father :) He then affirmed His love for me through these lines which He repeatedly
sang to me during my choir retreat.
'I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you and you are Mine.'
How humbled and grateful I am! My God loves Me! I am but a mere human being who does not deserve His love. He is so almighty and I am so small, so unworthy! He chose to overlook my flaws and sins, my impurity and dirt. How humbled I am!
And my heart rejoice in Him.'
As we sang the hymn My Soul Magnifies The Lord and these lines came, I know that my heart sang them too. It truly was the Holy Spirit glorifying God in me and Mother Mary praising Him with me, as I had prayed. My own relationship with God came to mind.
Actually, this prayer had been answered even before I prayed it. How great is my God who knows what I need even before I ask Him! How great is He for using me to glorify Himself! :) During Offertory, I was given the realization that I am special, set apart, anointed and chosen. Despite the times I nurse a flu, I can still sing to His glory. How indulgent and loving He is towards me!
The times He revealed His love for me came flooding back to me. I am referring specifically to God the Father, my Daddy-o. He first did so by calling me to a silent retreat and revealing His constant indulgence towards me. I believe the Holy Spirit gave me this name to address Him with, since they are so close to each other. The proof is that I thought it was just a name I myself came up with but it really means Abba Father :) He then affirmed His love for me through these lines which He repeatedly
sang to me during my choir retreat.
'I have loved you with an everlasting love
I have called you and you are Mine.'
How humbled and grateful I am! My God loves Me! I am but a mere human being who does not deserve His love. He is so almighty and I am so small, so unworthy! He chose to overlook my flaws and sins, my impurity and dirt. How humbled I am!
Sunday, August 5, 2012
God's love never leaves
Once God has poured out His love into me, it always remains. How assuring and comforting!
I don't always follow a daily prayer schedule and inevitably, am vulnerable to the devil's insidious ways. A thought against God's values crept into my my mind, but that was the wakeup call to go back in prayer to Him. Praying two decades of the Divine Mercy Chaplet helped pull me back :)
My God is great though. He doesn't leave me with the love He previously poured into me but gives me more of it. I felt a fleeting moment of it during Mass and that left me teary. I knew then that it was He who was again revealing His love to me. It may have been fleeting but it was real. With God, one second of reveling in Him is more than enough due to the intensity of it :)
He has shown me His miracles in my life too. I was down with a bad throat and cough, but I was still able to praise Him with my voice, though not at my usual level. Still, that was enough for me. He also physically sustained me and protected me from a bad fall :) He has been graciously answering my prayer and those of others for me, by healing my left arm.
The most obvious sign that I reciprocate His love, and that is important to me, is that I still feel love for Him when I pray certain P&W songs. I can thank Him with true gratitude, refresh my emotional weariness and irritation in His presence, and declare with my soul that "my heart will follow wholly after you". Praise the Lord!
Lastly, He still deems me worthy to be His gentle and humble instrument to others. I know that is true, for there is trust and openness towards me. I thank the Lord for His continual promptings in me :)
I don't always follow a daily prayer schedule and inevitably, am vulnerable to the devil's insidious ways. A thought against God's values crept into my my mind, but that was the wakeup call to go back in prayer to Him. Praying two decades of the Divine Mercy Chaplet helped pull me back :)
My God is great though. He doesn't leave me with the love He previously poured into me but gives me more of it. I felt a fleeting moment of it during Mass and that left me teary. I knew then that it was He who was again revealing His love to me. It may have been fleeting but it was real. With God, one second of reveling in Him is more than enough due to the intensity of it :)
He has shown me His miracles in my life too. I was down with a bad throat and cough, but I was still able to praise Him with my voice, though not at my usual level. Still, that was enough for me. He also physically sustained me and protected me from a bad fall :) He has been graciously answering my prayer and those of others for me, by healing my left arm.
The most obvious sign that I reciprocate His love, and that is important to me, is that I still feel love for Him when I pray certain P&W songs. I can thank Him with true gratitude, refresh my emotional weariness and irritation in His presence, and declare with my soul that "my heart will follow wholly after you". Praise the Lord!
Lastly, He still deems me worthy to be His gentle and humble instrument to others. I know that is true, for there is trust and openness towards me. I thank the Lord for His continual promptings in me :)
Monday, July 2, 2012
New perspectives on 'resting'
All those times, when I got slain, I took it as if it's God's power over me, and I am more open and filled with faith to Him than others. That was the most I could decipher of it. The crucial word is "power".
However, last night's intercessory prayer was made new for me. I felt joy and peace as I awaited my turn to be prayed over. I believe the Holy Spirit was already waiting for me before the actual prayer. He had heard my preparatory prayers to Him during the praise and worship segment, and just before the actual prayer.
The intercessors did not even ask me what my prayer intentions were. Immediately after being anointed, He overwhelmed me. The incredible realization was that He showed me that it was not just His power over me, but His love embracing me as I rested in Him. I felt as if He held me in His arms. I rested for a longer time and therefore, directly loved for a longer time. He had been waiting to shower me with His intense love :D
He has humbled me by revealing to me that His intercessors do not need to ask for my petitions, but with collective trust in Him, He will work in us. His intercessors are merely His channels, as long as they are open to His workings in them. It does not matter which parish they are from. Thank you, Daddy-o for correcting my misconception.
He keeps giving me more and more of His love ever since my silent retreat with Him. Being loved by God is so wonderful. He clearly looks past my unworthiness and impurity, and just loves. How can I not feel loved? Like I learnt at the retreat, the way to return His love is just to receive it and allow myself to BE loved.
However, last night's intercessory prayer was made new for me. I felt joy and peace as I awaited my turn to be prayed over. I believe the Holy Spirit was already waiting for me before the actual prayer. He had heard my preparatory prayers to Him during the praise and worship segment, and just before the actual prayer.
The intercessors did not even ask me what my prayer intentions were. Immediately after being anointed, He overwhelmed me. The incredible realization was that He showed me that it was not just His power over me, but His love embracing me as I rested in Him. I felt as if He held me in His arms. I rested for a longer time and therefore, directly loved for a longer time. He had been waiting to shower me with His intense love :D
He has humbled me by revealing to me that His intercessors do not need to ask for my petitions, but with collective trust in Him, He will work in us. His intercessors are merely His channels, as long as they are open to His workings in them. It does not matter which parish they are from. Thank you, Daddy-o for correcting my misconception.
He keeps giving me more and more of His love ever since my silent retreat with Him. Being loved by God is so wonderful. He clearly looks past my unworthiness and impurity, and just loves. How can I not feel loved? Like I learnt at the retreat, the way to return His love is just to receive it and allow myself to BE loved.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)